Puns Puns That Are So Stupid Theyre Funny

LOTR Quiz: Which Lord of the Rings character are you?

Quiz: Which Lord of the Rings character are you?

📖  Content:

  • 🤣   What is a Pun?
  • 🤩   Best Puns
  • 😂   Good Puns
  • 😈   Bad Puns
  • 😉   One Liner Puns

What is a Pun?

A pun is a funny way of doing wordplay. It exploits multiple meanings of words, or plays with words that sound similar but have different meanings. Puns make for great jokes that will either make people laugh or groan.

Some puns are easy to figure out, but some can make you think a little bit more. Don't sweat if a pun has to be explained to you. It's just a joke that's meant to lighten up the mood.

If you're someone who wants to get comfortable quickly when you meet new people or friends, puns are great conversation starters that will make people giggle whether they want to or not!

Once other people throw in their puns or jokes too, you're in for a great time with people that you can chill and laugh with!

👉 Take a look at more ideas for conversation starters!

Examples of Puns

There are many ways to come up with funny puns. They can be as simple as exchanging words that sound alike! It may seem dumb, but it's so funny!

What's important is not to take yourself too seriously and just roll with it! Take a look at some of these pun examples!

1. I love you a latte.

This is a pun where you play with how a word sounds. In this case, what the sentence really says is, "I love you a lot." This one-liner is great for people who want to be a little sweeter to each other!

2. May the fourth be with you!

If you're familiar with Star Wars, this phrase should sound familiar to you. It's based on a popular line from the Star Wars movies, "May the force be with you" and that May 4 is actually Star Wars day!

3. Grammar: the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

Since puns are all about word plays. This is another great example of a pun which emphasizes the different meaning of words even if they sound alike. In other words, know your shit!

Best Puns

Sometimes, the best puns can come out of the smallest things. Inspiration can hit you out of nowhere and you'll just want to make your friends laugh or groan in protest! Other times, you might need a bit more help to come up with clever puns.

Don't worry. We have put together a list of the best puns that you can use. These will either make you a hit with your friends, or will make your friends want to hit you!

1. I wish I could be a doctor, but I don't have the patients.

Doctors need a lot of patience and patients to survive!

2. Owls do not care. They don't give a hoot.

Why do owls look so aloof and snooty?

3. I bought a boat because it was on a sail.

And I thought the price was discounted?

4. Lawyers never die. They just lose their appeal.

Lawyers are so persistent!

5. Acupuncture is a jab well done.

I can't imagine jabbing all those needles on my body!

6. Two antennas got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

Do people still need antennas these days? There's cable and Netflix now!

It's just like getting a serving of the Golden Rule!

8. One lung said to another, "We be-lung together!"

To make a lung story short, yes, they should be together!

9. I asked a Frenchman if he played video games. He said, "Wii."

I prefer playing games on Nintendo Switch.

10. The male pig puts everyone to sleep.You might say he's quite a boar.

It's such a bore. I heard people snoring like pigs. This pun has now come full circle!

11. There was a kidnapping at school yesterday. Don't worry, though—he woke up.

Nice to hear the kid had a good nap!

Suggested read: Holiday Puns

12. I woke up in the morning to see a new version of myself. It was a mirror-cle.

This cheesy line is a miracle itself!

13. We always have some spare chairs in our house. We save them for emergency seat-uations.

Everyone gets a seat in our house!

14. I have so mushroom in my heart for you.

It's touching to know someone who has a big heart!

15. Broken puppets for sale. No strings attached.

Better fix the strings, so you can use them.

16. Sorry, affogato your name.

It's alright. I forgot your name too!

17. Think outside the Bachs.

When it comes to classical music, we should think outside the box. Classical pop music is becoming popular too!

18. Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

I've seen them all? Challenge accepted! I will visit all the shopping malls that I can find!

📖 Suggested read: 80+ Best Dad Jokes To Make You Laugh

19. I used to disapprove of organ transplants, but now I've had a change of heart.

Be an organ donor. Save a life!

20. I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.

More like jumped over it!

21. The guy who invented throat lozenges died last week.There was no coffin at the funeral.

The lozenges must have been effective!

22. Dancing chick to chick!

Does this mean dancing with one girl after another?

23. A century ago, two brothers decided it was possible to fly. And as you can see, they were Wright.

The Wright brothers got it right when they invented the first successful airplane.

24. I had an appointment to see my psychic next week, but she just called to cancel. She said I won't be able to make it.

She means she won't make it, right? Right?!

🤓 Suggested read: 50+ Fruity Puns To Make You Laugh

25. Peter Pan is a terrible boxer. Whenever he throws a punch, it Neverlands.

I'm not surprised. He's an eternal child!

Good Puns

One way to deliver good puns is to put them in the form of questions or knock knock jokes. You can also think of it as riddles that your friends need to answer. Make people come up with absurd guesses, and once everyone has given up, that's when you deliver the punchline!

You'll either make them laugh or want to kill you! As long as you get a reaction, you've done your job! Check out our list of good puns to get you started!

1. What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? (Answer: Sneakers)

Because ninjas love sneaking in undetected!

2. Why did the chicken cross the playground? (Answer: To get to the other slide!)

They want to go to the other side where there's a slide!

3. How does a scientist freshen her breath? (Answer: With experi-mints)

Her motto is "No mints. No kiss!"

4. Why can't you lie to the x-ray tech? (Answer: They can see right through you.)

It's like bear-ing your body and soul. It's a double pun FTW!

Suggested read: Valentines Day Puns

5. What does a school and a plant have in common? (Answer: STEM)

Are you good with Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics subjects?

6. What book won't teachers give you credit for reading? (Answer: Facebook)

You'll get an A for your online social life though.

7. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? (Answer: Because he had no body to go with)

It's ok. It didn't have any skin in the game and didn't care about the dance!

8. What do you call a religious person who sleepwalks? (Answer: a roamin' Catholic)

This is possible! Roman Catholics can sleepwalk too!

9. What did one elevator say to the other? (Answer: I think I'm coming down with something.)

Of course, elevators go up and down!

10. Why do math teachers make good dancers? (Answer: Because they have algorithm)

They must know how to dance to their own rhythm!

📖 Suggested read: 🧀 60+ Funny Cheese Puns To Make You Laugh

11. What do you call a fake noodle? (Answer: An impasta)

Does it still make for a good pasta dish?

12. What is the name of Darth Vader's rarely photographed wife? (Answer: Ella Vader)

Their relationship has its share of ups and downs!

13. Do you want to know why I hate circles so much? (Answer: They're just so pointless)

If they have a point, then they wouldn't be a circle anymore.

14. What kind of cats like to go bowling ? (Answer: Alley cats)

Let's go to the bowling alley and play with the cats!

15. What do you call a knight who hates fighting? (Answer: Sir Render)

Sir Render should fight to the end and not surrender!

16. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a fish? (Answer: Swimming trunks)

I had to think a little more with this one.

17. Why did the giraffe get bad grades? (Answer: Because he had his head in the clouds)

It also likes to daydream!

👉 Suggested read: 35+ Knock Knock Jokes That Make You Laugh

18. What happens when it's raining cats and dogs? (Answer: I don't know but you can step on poodles.)

Nooo! Don't step on poodles!

19. Where do milkshakes come from? (Answer: Nervous cows)

Why would anyone make cows feel nervous? That's animal cruelty!

20. What type of candy is never on time? (Answer: Choco-late)

I don't care. I still love chocolate berry much!

21. What do you call a musician with problems? (Answer: a trebled man)

Why do I keep hearing Taylor Swift singing, "'Cause I knew you were trouble when you walked in…"

22. Why are all dogs bad storytellers? (Answer: Because they only have one tale)

Some even run after their own tail!

23. Why was King Arthur's army too tired to fight? (Answer: All of those sleepless knights)

They need to stay alert even during nights!

24. What is a chicken's favorite movie? (Answer: A Cluckwork Orange)

This sounds like a movie I'd want to see!

25. Where do snowmen keep their savings? (Answer: in the snowbank)

They want to keep their cold hard cash somewhere safe.

👉 Get more questions from our list of 400+ riddles with answers!

Bad Puns

It's perfectly normal to have bad puns. No one's perfect, you know! But are bad puns really bad? Sometimes, there are bad puns that are so bad that they end up making people laugh! Then that's not so bad after all! Who cares if they laugh in disbelief?!

Don't look down on bad puns. They can still be hilarious in their own way. Decide for yourself if the following are truly bad puns!

1. Why was the broom late for school? (Answer: It overswept)

What a diligent broom!

2. When do bankers become bored? (Answer: When they lose interest)

Hope they become bored more often.

3. It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

It was so beautiful and touching. Everyone cried!

4. What do you get if you cross a snake with a pie? (Answer: A pie-thon)

Let's get some apple pie!

5. What do you call a funny jar of mayonnaise? (Answer: LMAYO)

Hahahahaha! This made me ROTFL!

6. What do you call a noodle that doesn't drink? (Answer: Soba)

Better sober up with some hot noodle soup after a night of drinking.

7. What happens when accountants become overweight? (Answer: They lose their figures)

They lose money too.

8. Is this real life or just a Fanta-sea?

I dare you not to sing this to the tune of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody!

9. Why do gorillas have big nostrils? (Answer: Because they have big fingers)

They must do a lot of digging in there!

10. The last thing I want to do is hurt you; but it's still on the list.

Hope you don't finish your list!

11. You do realize that vampires aren't real unless you Count Dracula.

So, they are real!

12. Houses in London often have cute and colorful doors. They are all adoorable.

I love adorable red doors!

Suggested read: Pizza Puns

13. What do you call an upset brownie? (Answer: A frownie)

No wonder the frownie was a bit bitter!

14. My mom forced me to discard my old toys, but I was not ready to Lego of them.

I love playing with Lego!

15. My grandfather left behind his favorite armchair. We chair-ish it.

We love sitting on it!

16. Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

That makes sen- wait… hol up!

17. How did I escape Iraq? (Answer: I ran.)

And you rocked your escape!

18. R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist.

It's as if water vanished into thin air! Isn't that what evaporation means?

19. A told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.

Eyebrows should be on fleek!

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20. Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

That's a good thing! What happens if he was hit with hard drinks?

21. What does a pizza say when it introduces itself to you? Slice to meet you.

I don't care. I need pizza in my tummy now!

22. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? (Answer: Where is pop corn?)

Pop goes the weasel!

23. When life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.

Better make some lemonade!

24. I asked the lion in my wardrobe what he was doing there. (Answer: He said it was Narnia business.

What a rude wardrobe!

25. What did the teacher say when the horse walked into the class? (Answer: Why the long face?)

The horse must have been sad.

One Liner Puns

One liner puns may be short and sweet, but they can still make an impact! Some may come across like riddles that you need to solve. Others may come across as pun jokes. Either way is fine as long as you get a good laugh! Keep in mind that puns are like jokes based on wordplay. It's not rocket science!

📖 Suggested read: Top 40 What's the Difference Between Jokes

If you want quick zingers to spice up the mood with your friends, here's our list of one liner puns!

1. I don't suffer from insanity—I enjoy every minute of it.

Insanity is relative anyway!

2. A blind man walked into a bar… and a table… and a chair.

To be honest, I didn't see that coming.

3. It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

They're good with taking things at face value.

4. The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

They were totally drained.

5. I went to buy some camouflage pants but couldn't find any.

They blend with the rest of the pants.

6. I failed math so many times at school that I can't even count.

I'm counting on you to get better some day!

7. I used to have a handle on life, but then it broke.

That's sad to hear.

Suggested read: Frog Puns

8. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

How can I make a decision?

9. I wasn't able to make reservations at the library – they're completely booked.

By booked, it means the library has a lot of books! Too bad I still wasn't able to get in.

10. I didn't like having long nails, but they're growing on me.

Of course, nails grow. Now, I can scratch someone's eyes out.

11. I went to a seafood disco last week, but ended up pulling a mussel.

Even if I ended up pulling a muscle, I did get to eat mussels!

12. I heard Cinderella tried out for the basketball team, but she kept running away from the ball.

Cinderella would have made a bad basketball player.

13. My friend's bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.

Too soon. I feel like we shouldn't joke about it yet.

14. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.

Flying is all about being lifted into the air, and if it's possible, I want to have that ability!

🤓 Suggested read: 🐠 50 Funny Fish Puns To Make You Laugh

15. I thought my nose was bleeding, but it's not.

Upon closer look, it was booger.

16. German sausage jokes are just the wurst.

Good thing bratwurst sausages are good!

17. Be kind to dentists – they have fillings too.

I have fillings. They have fillings. We all have feelings!

18. A Freudian slip is when you mean one thing and mean your mother.

People pay a small fortune to their psychiatrist to realize that it's the parents' fault!

19. Hearing about the haunted refrigerator was chilling.

It really scared me!

20. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

What a scary thought! And I thought it was a good thing at first!

21. I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. .

Be careful! You don't want to deal with a hangry person.

22. If you know any good fish jokes, let minnow.

Let me fix that for you. Let me know if you know any good fish jokes!

23. If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?

That's so harsh! It's bad to litter and to hurt cats!

24. Romaine calm and carry on.

Must remain calm at all times!

25. It's no fun telling jokes to cattle; they've herd it all.

Since cattle come together in herds, they must joke a lot!

Want to get more pun ideas? 👉 Get inspiration from riddles for kids!

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Source: https://psycatgames.com/magazine/conversation-starters/funny-puns/

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